the action of giving someone support, confidence, or hope.

Recently I took a kick boxing class (Try new things, CHANGE!) and I realized again the POWER of encouragement.

Bill, our instructor, had an entire class of “first timers” that were a bit worried about this new adventure.

And we were awful.  I am sure of it.  Yet he said it over and over.

“You got it.”

“That’s perfect.”

“That’s spot on.”

“Yep, that’s exactly right.”

When he did give a correction it was SO POWERFUL because of all the honest praise.  It really wanted me to do well.  “Joel, just open your hips up a little for more power.  There you go.  You got it.”  I could feel my spirits soar.

The best thing he did:  One student was really struggling.  She said “I don’t think I can do this.”  She was overwhelmed.  Bill joyously and calmly said, “You are doing fine.  You know what, I will do this WITH YOU.”  And that segment he did with that person.  She did great!  He helped her one on one get over her own fears.

Even though deep down I was thinking, “Holy Cow I suck.  I must look like an idiot.”  Bill, made me think “Wow, maybe I CAN do this.  Maybe he seems something in me that I don’t see.”

After class he said with a smile, “Boy, you guys did great.  I was surprised how high you could kick.”   He didn’t mention the 1,000 things I need to work on.  Heck, I know I need a ton of work.  He could of said, “boy we got a long ways to go,” and we would of dragged our tired feet and spirits out of the gym.  But he made us feel like champs just with those bits of encouragement; I am confident most of us will be coming back for more.

It wasn’t false flattery.  He found the things we were doing RIGHT, instead of the 1,000 things we were doing wrong.

 ***

Hopefully we all can learn from Bill.

My friend Ken Wilbanks preaches the golden rule:  A 10 to 1 ratio of positive encouragement for each correction. 10-1!

Think about the word’s definition:

THE ACTION OF GIVING SUPPORT, CONFIDENCE, HOPE.

 What an incredible way to live your life!

 And if they are really struggling simply say, Hey I believe in you, LET ME DO IT WITH YOU.  How powerful our actions are if we do it WITH THEM.

 – Joel Fleischman.  Joel is Head Coach of the solution providers for Drexel Building Supply.  (drexelteam).   You can follow him on twitter:  @JoelmFleischman.  He has provided solutions for builders and their clients since 1996 and a whole bunch of other stuff that you probably don’t care about.